[pendoza]

Someone would expect a 38 year old pretty smart guy who has a good job and no recent problems at all to know what to do.. but it seems that is not true. I cannot trust myself keeping the promises and made to myself. Like I’m under the impression of the Imperus Curse, for those who like me is still a fan of Harry Potter. No self control whatsoever.

I have been gambling since I was 15. I remember working whole week with some friends at our summer holiday job and getting 30 euro for that. At friday when work was over we went to the local snackbar and started gambling our hard earned money away in the slot that was present there. Thinking back that was the start of a dark journey that has not seen it’s end just yet. I always was interested into slots. In my teens and early 20’s we also went to pubs and bars. And back then you had slot machines in each and every one of them. I wasted all my time behind them, occasionally some friends would come over or just happened to walk by for second time the last hour. They would ask in disbelieve ‘are you still behind that thing?’, ‘have you won much?’.
Well I never won much. A trend I sadly persist keeping with me. I always felt bad after spending that much time behind the slots and not even having fun or winning. And even when I won I didn’t feel anything.

Back then it was maximum 50 euro I would lost. Then came the online casino’s. Man o man. I don’t even want to know how much money I lost there. If I do a quick math it would be around 200K – 250K euro. It sickens me. Sometimes I would spend 4K-8K in one go. All money gone. Or going from 4K plus to a 4K loss in one night. Those are messing with your mind also I can tell you.

There is so much more to tell but let’s say I finally came around and want to write here when I want to do it again. Of course I hope this will be the end of it all.

I just had a session where I went from a + €150 to a loss of €300. Then I wanted to self exclude from casino but because I am already self excluded from each and every casino imaginable I only can gamble on those fake Curacao casino. Those are the biggest scams of all. They recreate all favorite slots and you can see they are fake. They are so baiting you with ‘near misses’ that you can see the same ones 25x in a row. The slots I mean are ‘Book of Dead’, ‘Book of Gold: Multispin’ and ‘Buffalo King: Megaways’.
I wanted to self exclude but it’s impossible via the site. You need to contact 24/7 chat but the chat is just a forward support ticket by email. So you need to email them to self exclude. Hoping they would even read them and fulfill your request.

Stay away from casino’s mates.. best advice I can give

[charles]

Hello and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums. By posting to the forums you’re allowing the diverse and caring Gambling Therapy community to help support you through the difficulties you’re facing.

This may well be a tough time for you – particularly if you’re new to recovery, so we encourage you to post here as often as you need to, as well as making use of the online groups and the live advice helpline if you’d like some one-to-one support. We’re all in this together! If you’re a new member, you are warmly invited to join Charles in one of the New Members Practical Advice groups (Mondays at 21:00 UK Time and Thursdays at 19:00 UK Time).

The forum is a great place to share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. By writing it all down you can start to build a record of your progress that you can look back on – particularly useful if you’re ever feeling stuck. Share as much or as little as you like – but you’re encouraged to stick to keeping to just one thread in this forum – so people know where to find you to check in on your progress or to share something with you.

The Gambling Therapy staff team don’t generally post to the forums as it is a peer support area of the site – so we’ll hand you over to the community from here.

Take care,

The Gambling Therapy Team

PS. Please take a moment to review our privacy policy and terms and conditions so you know how it all works.

[??????]

?????????