[DCH]

Well ive decided to join. After many years of controllable small value gambling and controlled withdrawals, things have progressed. BJ online is starting to take hold. I have been spending upwards of ￡300 per month for the last 5 years, but 2 recent sittings where ive won big and should have withdrawn walked away and enjoyed the fruits with my family, i didnt …..then lost the lot. I have realised i have a problem. I am in a relationship, lovely home and family and finances for that side are not touched. I spend my own “pocket money” but that now seems to go monthly and i cut into a my credit card with a reduced ￡500 limit (did this a few years ago sensibly as i thought i liked a gamble). I need to stop now before i start using the family finances or get into serious debt. Ive just looked onto this site today for the first time and read some stories, which i relate to and find harrowing. Ive signed up and want to engage until i am in a position where i am in a better frame of mind to beat this permanently.

Best wishes to all

DCH

[i-did-it]

Hi DCH, for many of us this addiction sneaks up on us and we are so far in debt by the time we realise we are addicted that it is an uphill struggle . So well done on recognising that you have a problem .
The advice you will get is to stop gambling completely – and if you find this difficult put barriers in place like gambling blockers on your laptop and phone , cut up and cancel all cards and get someone else to take care of your finances .

I hope you find this site helpful – you will get lots of support on here

[DCH]

im closing down my online casino account as we speak but the agent is trying everything in their power to give me options instead of full closure….

I am far from out the woods, small debt in comparison, and im sure the urge will be there….but im absolutely sick of this feeling

[i-did-it]

Close it and if u have money you could buy a gambling blocker like betfilter or gamblock.
Well done on taking action . Just think what a great year 2018 will be without gambling dragging you down

[DCH]

I really appreciate you taking the time. Its nice to get reassuring words and someone to talk to. I can never disclose to my family, my missus would not be sympathetic so i need to overcome on my own. I feel lousy, but positive at the same time, and im fully aware of how difficult the road ahead will be on me. Ive had 2 big scares, both after big wins strangely enough, one a few years ago and i stopped for ages…maybe months, the second just 2 days ago so still feeling a little wounded. You are correct, 2018 can be a great year but it needs self discipline, no one else can sort my problem. Can i ask, are you recovering or have you recovered?

DCH

[i-did-it]

I DCH I have been trying to stop for about 8years .
I have barriers so even if I do lapse I can actually gamble very little – there are people on here who have been in recovery for years and people who still struggle.
Many people find GA helpful (I didn’t ) and others use different support .
There are facilitated support groups on here which you may find helpful.
Most people have tried to go it alone before eventually seeking help . Most people find the support is necessary to stop.

It really doesn’t matter how long anyone has stopped – the addiction will always be part of us – and we are all the same distance from our next bet.

The site is a little quiet over the Christmas period but you will get so much support and practical advice on here . Just think what a difference it will make to have all those ￡300s in your bank account!

Most of us feel low after Big wins because most of us lose them fairly quickly and then think about how it could have helped our families . I try to think it’s not real money but fantasy money .

Hope this helps DCH

[DCH]

Ive made the first step now anyway, by recognising and joining this forum. lets see what transpires. I will look at putting in barriers where i can. Its mind boggling how gambling can cloud your judgement. the thought of all that ￡300 in the bank sound great, and thats my focus, the risk for me and others no doubt, is the time line for all that to bear fruit, and the urges in between.

Thank you for chatting this morning. I will sign off for now, but i feel i need to return to this firum regularly and post, as i think this will be my release and focus to better times. I look forward to catching up again soon i did It ??

Thank you

Kevin

[DCH]

Inspired by others, i will try post daily…if i can manage it….
No gambling yesterday. Need to keep busy today, and intend going for a long walk. Im not back to work until the 3rd Jan. I am happy with that as it gives me time to get my head right, but the downtime could be challenging. I am feeling better today, still wounded, but positive. I must remind myself how evil, destructive and painful this addiction is.

Love to all

[i-did-it]

One day at a time DCH.
Here’s to a gamble free future

[velvet]

Hello DCH and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums

Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. We’re in this together!

Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick to keeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to be updated on your progress or share something with you.

As well as the forums New Members are invited to join Charles in the New Members Practical Advice Group On Mondays at 21:00 (UK) and Thursday at 19:00(UK)

And on that note….

I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you ??

Take care

The Gambling Therapy Team

PS: Let me just remind you to take a look at our privacy policy and terms and conditions so you know how it all works!

[Johnny B]

DCH,
Well done on putting the blockers in place with the credit before too much damage was done. I think it takes a lot of moxy to recognize what can potentially be a problem. I have been about 2 months gamble free… I stopped counting the days, because if I do go off the rails, I find one of my triggers is the shame I cause myself. So for me it is one day at a time. I met with my counselor today and had the discussion that I cannot say for sure that I will never gamble again, but I know I will not gamble for today. (He said I made him nervous to say such things)…however it is only up to me to make sure I choose the right path. As it is for you.
Good Luck
Johnny B

[charles]

Hi DCH,

Well done on looking for help. Did you close that casino account? It is a good move of course but I would recommend going one step further – ask them to ban you. That way you can’t reopen it. As others have mentioned, a blocker is also a good idea – it’ll stop you finding other sityes if/when the urges return.

I would agree with I did IT, anyone can return to gambling and in my opinion there is no such thing as a recoverED addict. If we need help to stop gambling then the trick is to keep using support to maintain recovery as well.

Keep posting.

[DCH]

Yes Charles, I did close it …. took as long as trying to withdraw winnings !!…. I have enquiried about Gamstop that’s going to launch in early spring …. I bumped an old thread earlier, it may be the saviour of many in the uk …. until then I’m going for willpower … I’m not a member on any other gambling sites and I need to be able to control my urges if I’m going to beat this

As has been said to me …. one day at a time ….I’ve walked 8 miles both last 2 days …. the blisters are not as painful as a big loss

Take care all …. I’m here posting for the long haul

[DCH]

No gamble since joining. I dont know how i feel today, not so much of an urge, but the remorse of the recent big loss has returned. Is this a manifestation of not yet accepting the monetary loss or the addiction playing up…just one more go. Anyway, its not happening, long lie in bed, need to get up and active as lying about does no good as you just overthink

Have a great day all…

[i-did-it]

Hi DCH, this is the addiction stirring .
At first you will feel remorse…then it will whisper if I did it once I can win it again…then it will convince you that it is possible to do again…then once you are back in the cycle you may or may not win…but once we addicted …we never keep the cash.
It will all go back…either that day or over the next few. I have repeated this cycle so often it is amazing I have not learned.

If we weren’t addicted, we would have kept the first win.
If we weren’t addicted we would never have put on high enough bets to get a big win.

The only way to win for us is to stay away. For us that is a huge ask, as gambling has become like the lover we cannot get out of our minds.

Urges will come and go but the general advice is to ride them out…keep putting off the effort an hour, a day or whatever works for you.

And keep writing about it.
DCH there are groups on in the nights where you can chat to others. You might find those helpful.

I hope you find my post helpful …it does feel rather like a do as I say not as I do post.

Have a happy gamble free day !

[DCH]

Ive nothing groundbreaking to tell, or words of wisdom to share. Still here, still posting, still not gambled

Hope all are well today, stay strong

DCH

[i-did-it]

Well done DCH- not gambling isa great achievement. You are doing great!

[velvet]

Hi DCH
It seems to me that every time you write ‘Still here, still posting, still not gambled’ you are sharing wisdom. The more voices giving the same positive message is music to the ears of those who want to control their addiction,
I think it is necessary to break ground to allow the seeds of recovery to grow and you are doing that too.
Great Post
Velvet

[DCH]

That’s a positive way of looking at it

I hope we can all overcome together

Happy new year when it comes all, 2018 is going to be a beauty of a year for us all

[DCH]

Day 5 since gamble and none this year….

take care

[i-did-it]

Well done DCH – the days are building up and I hope you are feeling positive and motivated .
Onwards and upwards DCH

[DCH]

I hope all are well and healthy
Last day off before returning to work tomorrow. Always a thought, but work is a great distraction for me. We need to work to earn to live, its as simple as that, and i am absolutely determined to put my hard earned money to better use in future.

Take care all

DCH

[kathryn]

Great to read of your gamble free time!
Seems like you are filling your time with good old fashioned fresh air, food for the body and the mind.
I hope Work was kind to you today, my work closes for 2 weeks over Christmas, I have 5 days left before I go back (who’s counting!!) but it’s going to be bedlam…ugh.
Anyway, well done again, look forward to reading your updates.
Love K xx

[DCH]

Thanks for taking the time to post

Its today im back to work, groan…Im about to get going as i start in a an hour or so, but its just another new chapter( for this year) thats about to begin

im glad the festivities are now over, but i want to make sure I enjoy it more next year

DCH

[i-did-it]

Hi DCH,
I’m back to work tomorrow but the way you put it makes it seem not so bad. I too will be putting my hard earned money to better use .
You are doing really well . Keep strong as 2018 promises to be a great year.

[DCH]

Likewise, we can suffer work together lol

Lets remember that…HARD EARNED CASH….. to be put to better use, fools of the past no more

take care and ease yourself back into work gently

DCH

[finding_laura]

Well done DCH on all your steps forward. Happy New Year to you! When you feel blah (which we sometimes do in the beginning) think of all the ways you will spend your hard earned cash. Not imaginary winnings that are never withdrawn. Well done. Enjoy your last day of holidays.
Laura

[DCH]

I appreciate your kind words

I hope things are going well for you also

DCH

[i-did-it]

Hi DCH,
Thank you for dropping by and posting on my thread – it is much appreciated .
Good luck with work tomorrow !
Just think how great it will be to have that January pay cheque all to spend on you and none on gambling. All those ￡300 will add up to quite a bit by the summer! Looks like is is going to be a great year !

[DCH]

Since my last post a few weeks ago, and prior which i was posting each day since joining, im afraid being busy with work and lazyness set in and i havent posted since. I still havent gambled, the depression and low thoughts of the big win that was in my clutches and then gone, have all but disappeared and its now old hat. In the last 2 weeks, ive only contemplated a gamble once, due to weekend time on my own and boredom, but i stayed strong. Im still walking for some sort of fitness and trying to keep busy and out of trouble. Soon the weather will break in springtime and my hobby will take my time over. I hope everyone is keeping well, gamble free (or if not winning and cashing out at least) especially those who have taken the time to comment on my thread and especially i-did-it, who was the first to reply to me on joining.

Take care everyone, i will be back…sooner or later

DCH

[DCH]

Since my last post a few weeks ago, and prior which i was posting each day since joining, im afraid being busy with work and lazyness set in and i havent posted since. I still havent gambled, the depression and low thoughts of the big win that was in my clutches and then gone, have all but disappeared and its now old hat. In the last 2 weeks, ive only contemplated a gamble once, due to weekend time on my own and boredom, but i stayed strong. Im still walking for some sort of fitness and trying to keep busy and out of trouble. Soon the weather will break in springtime and my hobby will take my time over. I hope everyone is keeping well, gamble free (or if not winning and cashing out at least) especially those who have taken the time to comment on my thread and especially i-did-it, who was the first to reply to me on joining.

Take care everyone, i will be back…sooner or later

DCH

[i-did-it]

Thank you for posting on my thread DCH. And thank you for your lovely comment.
You are doing so well and it sounds like you are getting stronger and stronger in recovery.
I am pleased to say I have not gambled this year and it is now three weeks since I last gambled .
You see what we can all do when we support each other .
Well done !

[DCH]

Strength in numbers…..

[finding_laura]

Look at how many of us can say gamble free in 2018! Excercise is great to get some endorphins flowing. And spring is a lovely thought. Keep on going! You are doing a lot of the right things. Replacing bad habits with good and filling your time will help immensely. Take care! Laura

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