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    • #51943
      hambone
      Participant

      I’ve been an addict of some form or another my whole life. I remember as a young kid riding my bike across town to play the claw machine and try to win stuffed animals. It’s always been something, whether it was drugs, gambling, alcohol. It took me a long time to realize this.

      I started out playing poker, all the time. I snuck on computers at work to play. I borrowed money from friends, opened credit cards behind my wifes back, borrowed from my 401k. It all came crashing down a few years later when my wife found out, and she forgave me. I worked hard to fix everything, and for awhile I was successful. However, things happened that put me in a position where I needed money, and the only way I could come up with it was gambling.

      Fast forward to 2016. I had been clean for quite awhile, when I got a large bill from the IRS for back taxes related to cashing out my 401k (for gambling). Rather than tell my wife, I tried to get the money myself, from gambling of course. Eventually, I lost everything I had, still owed the IRS, and was out of ideas. I ended up using a company credit card to try and chase losses. I ran up about 50k in charges before they caught up, and fired me. Luckily, I Was taking another job a few days later, because I knew it was coming. The new job required me to move my family across country, and my problems followed me.

      Eventually, I ended up where I am now. I have about $100k in personal loans, I have several credit cards with 5k balances that were closed by the companies, and I have an $11k car loan I have been paying because my wife thought we paid it off a year ago (i took the money to pay bills). My credit was absolutely destroyed, I kept taking out more loans trying to win enough to pay back the others, unti finally the banks wouldnt loan to me.

      So, I decided I needed to do something about it. Fortunately, I make a good salary, and work from home. I got a second job working from home, and now I do 2 fulltime jobs at once. I take home $8400 a month in extra income, and every penny has been paid to my debts. I’ve got everything in a spreadsheet, and i schedule bills weeks in advance so the day I get paid, everything is gone.

      It’s been about 3 months since I’ve gambled, and it’s already starting to fade. It’s crazy how messed up your brain can be, but I promise, you will “re-wire” yourself. When I think about all the crazy shit I used to do, it’s absolutely mindblowing. I realize now that I never enjoy gambling. Sure, I got the endorphins and the highs and lows, but I was always gambling to try and chase. I saw a counselor who explained that the tricky thing about gambling addiction is its the only addiction where the addiction itself is the means to an end.

      In 8 weeks, the $11k loan will be paid off, I will own our car, and my credit score keeps, climbing up 85 points in 3 months. I’ve made on time payments for the last 3 months on every loan and debt I have, and I have a plan for the future. I know my situation isn’t the same as everyone, but I am here to tell you, GAMBLING IS NOT THE MEANS TO AN END. You can NOT CHASE this. You will NEVER CATCH T. Our brains are wired incorrectly to trick us into thinking we can get it back, we’ll get on a hot streak, we can solve this by gambling. YOU CAN NOT. Get help. Talk to someone. Get a financial assistances. Come clean if yu need to, just STOP GAMBLING. You will NEVER beat this addiction by GAMBLING MORE!

    • #51944
      jen3
      Participant

      Thanks for your post. I think I am finally sick and tired of being sick and tired BUT I have felt this way more times than I can *****. Like you I make good money BUT not much to show for it. I have climbed in and out of debt most of my adult life. I’be seen Counslor’s, did meetings. Hell I have been coming here on and off for 10 plus years. The light bulb always goes off and than 30, 60, 90 days and my addicted brain remembers only positives. Really as if there is anything positive about gambling. Anyways Great Job! Keep it up and I hope to be in your same place three months from now.

    • #51945
      dunc
      Participant

      Hello and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums

      Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. We’re in this together!

      Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick to keeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to be updated on your progress or share something with you.

      As well as the forums New Members are invited to join Charles in the New Members Practical Advice Group On Mondays at 21:00 (UK) and Thursday at 19:00(UK)

      And on that note….

      I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you ??

      Take care

      The Gambling Therapy Team

      PS: Let me just remind you to take a look at our privacy policy and terms and conditions so you know how it all works!

    • #51946
      charles
      Moderator

      Hi Hambone,

      I am pleased to read that you have managed o turn things around. I would urge you to keep using suport though. I am sure you thought you had finished for gopd the first time you got into trouble.

      Can you speak to your wife? What acountabiliy can you put in place so that if/when the urges reurn you will be less able to act on them.

      Keep posting.

    • #51947
      charles
      Moderator

      It is also important to plan your gamble free ime careffully – if you have previously switched between drugs/drink/gambling etc then try and find a variety of options so that you dont ge hooked on something else. Healthier options.

    • #51948
      hambone
      Participant

      Everytime I go back to gambling its because I am in financial durress and like an idiot, think I can bet my way out of it instead of dealing with it. I recognize that now and hope to avoid it in the future, I have better ways to solve financial issues.

      If I told my wife anything now, she would leave, 100%. I am trying my hardest to fix this so I can move on and never discuss it again. It’s been stressful, and its going to take time. It happened so fast, I got 100k in debt in less than 1 year, and its going to take me longer than that to fix it, but I will get there.

      I was drinking the most and trying drugs when I was at my lowest, getting 10+ calls a day from different lenders and months behind on debt. I couldn’t sleep, could hardly function, so when we went out for drinks I would just numb myself. I’ve gotten a handle on my finances now, and that stuff has faded as well. Now I’m just focused on trying to maintain multiple jobs and getting things paid off. I have payments scheduled for next weeks pay already, and I’ve gotten really good at scheduling them so that I dont have any actual money.

      Additionally, I was gambling using bitcoin. The markets I bought on have all banned me, and it’s just too hard to buy bitcoin, so I can’t gamble even if I wanted to. Right now I have $125 in my secret bank account, but if I use it, it will be for food, groceries etc.

      I agree though, it will get hard again at some point. Financial stress is my trigger, which turns into a vicious cycle when I’m gambling, because every time I lose, I feel more compelled to gamble again. This will be a long fight, but after about 3 months without betting, I feel like a new person.

    • #51949
      hambone
      Participant

      Just as a follow up, still going strong. I’m working 3 full-time jobs at the same time now, it’s extremely stressful and exhausting – I am starting a 4th on Tuesday. My plan is to quit one, but if I can drag it out for about a month and get 2 more paychecks I’ll have my car finally paid off and can focus on the 3 jobs. If all goes well, after September 20th my van will be paid for and I’ll be able to throw 3 monthly salaries at getting myself out of debt. My credit has jumped about 100 points, and I think with a 650 score and a large salary I can hopefully get approved for a new car once this one is paid for.

      Last week my transmission died on the car. It was going to be $2800 to fix. Normally, I’d instantly think I needed to win the money – this time, I got out my spreadsheet, adjusted my upcoming bills and paid for it out of pocket when I got paid. It set me back about 10 days in my plan, but that’s life.

      Life is good, I’m so busy I don’t think I could gamble. The fog that I was walking through has lifted and all the crazy stuff I used to do seems like a distant memory.

      I wish you all the best, stay strong

    • #51950
      Meghna83
      Participant

      You are doing an amazing job H

      you are determined and focused 

      i wish you you all the best 

    • #51951
      Gbabyh
      Participant

      Good job man. Like you, I too am triggered by financial duress, and just reading how you coped with your first obstacle and realized it only set you back by 10 days was awesome! Keep it coming my friend ??

      – Chris

    • #51952
      hambone
      Participant

      Got paid yesterday and it’s still sitting in my account, used it for things I need and that was it, before I’d have been up all night waiting for the direct deposit to hit so I could buy Bitcoin and gamble. There have been so many times I lost an entire paycheck before the sun came up on payday. That feeling, knowing is be getting phone calls for the next 2 weeks, was the worst ever. Begging the account reps at the betting sites for free bets, nowhere I want to ever be again.

      I got an email last night from a betting site, they had credited me $25 for football season. I deleted it and moved on.

      Next Friday is my bigger paycheck that goes towards the things I really need to pay off. I just need to keep things afloat for 20 days and I’ll have the car finally paid off.

      Everyday seems so long, not because of a lack of gambling, I guess when you have a plan and see how long it’s going to take to dig yourself out of the hole, things take even longer

    • #51953
      hambone
      Participant

      Checking in again…

      This time last year I essentially stole $15k from my wife, telling her I paid our van off while actually gambling it, paying off some loans I had taken off while continuing to make the monthly payment in secret.

      In April 2019 I started a 2nd fulltime job, and didnt tell my wife. I do both jobs from home, and use all the extra income to pay off loans/cards/debts. In July, I started a third job, telling my wife about this. We use 100% of this income to pay off our student loans, with the hopes of having both of ours paid off in 1 year.

      2 weeks ago, I took a 4th job and put my notice in for my original job (they were laying off people). I continued working the oldest job for a month (not doing much) to collect 2 more paychecks to put towards my debts.

      Long story short; on 9/30/2019 my van will be paid off, it was $15k 3 months ago. I paid off 1 of my credit cards, and have one with a $5800 balance that will be paid off 10/15. All my debts are being paid on time, and my credit score is riding. I don’t even consider gambling anymore, I have my finances for the next few months all documented, so I can see exactly where I will be if I stay the course. I’m still paying about $3500 a month in loans/debts from my gambling life, but I take home about double that, so once I Get my cards and car paid off next month I will be able to make double payments and hopefully be out of this hole in a year max.

      I realize I am fortunate in my job situation and a lot of people dont have these opportunities. If I didnt have extra jobs and a clear path out of debt, I would be gambling out of necessity. I encourage everyone out there to evaluate whether youre gambling for fun, for the rush, or because you see it as your only way out. I always felt like the only way I could pay my bills was to win money. I was over $100k in debt, what good does making small payments make? I need to win the money back! Unfortunately, thats what got me in this situation.

      Sit down, make a plan how you can get where you need to be WITHOUT gambling, and stick to it.

      Now, I get so excited looking at my spreadsheet and calling to schedule payments. I check my credit score almost daily. In March, it was 525. Now, its 626-661 depending where you look. Once my recent payments get reported to the credit bureaus, I hope to be close to 700 and finally able to obtain financing for a new van.

      6 months ago, when I Was at my absolute bottom, I took out a $3000 payday advance loan. I’ve made the payments for 6 months, and yesterday they called me to tell me I was eligible for another loan. Previously, I would have been down there within minutes, but I told them no thank you, and hung up.

      It’s hard to put into words how far I’ve come in the last few months. My last bet was around May 7th, with a 2 bet relapse on July 3rd. I don’t mean to brag or sound arrogant, I just dont have anyone in my life who knows about all of this, so this is where I can talk about how happy I am.

      I wish you all the best.

    • #51954
      Relapseking
      Participant

      Wow i just want to say that i am astounded by the story you have shared. I can relate to some of the emotions you share. I have lost a lot of money too but at a much smaller scale to you. I have never experienced having as much money as you so the amount ive lost is a lot to me anyway. Im amazed at how hard of a worker you are and how far youve come. It takes a really big character to make a comeback, the way that you have and it is highly motivating. You had been given many opportunities to give up as i know many people would but you pushed through and have such a solid plan put together. You havr inspired me sir so i too will put a plan together tomorrow and start looking towards the future too. Im wishing you the best and rooting for you to stay strong and on the track you are. You deserve to get through this. I can’t even fathom working more than 1 job so you are definitely ahead of a lot of people when it comes to work ethic. I hope everything works out for you, you have come so far and should hopefully never feel the need to gamble again. Stick with the forums and finding ways to keep on track. Looking forward to hearing more updates, all the best man.

    • #51955
      hambone
      Participant

      Final car payment scheduled for Monday. More bills scheduled to be paid next week. Head down and grinding.

    • #51956
      hambone
      Participant

      Still fighting. I had $5000 USD in my bank all weekend and didnt spend anything, previously I would convince myself to gamble, end up losing it all and then all my bills would overdraft the following day. I paid off my car 3 days ago, and I get paid from another job tomorrow, so I have all but $150 scheduled to goto bills.

      Even with all the progress I’ve made, I still struggle with the day to day life of a non gambler. I’m not sure how long our brains need to re-wire and not need the dopamine, but I am still looking for some sort of stimulation after being a high stakes sports better everyday for the last 5-10 years.

      I just realized today is exactly 3 months clean. I’ve made huge progress paying off debts, probably paid $30,000 USD in those 3 months, money that would have been gambled before. I’m proud of the success, but I am frustrated with how long it takes for things to improve. I want my credit score fixed, I Want my loans paid off so I Can go back to working 1 job and have a normal life.

      I guess I need to stop feeling sorry for myself, I did this to myself and it took years to create this damage, its going to take more than 3 months to fix. I’m very fortunate to have the opportunities I have to get myself out of this.

    • #51957
      hambone
      Participant

      Just checking in. Still GF. Last week I got the title to my van in the mail, which was a surreal moment. For those of you who don’t know, last year I took 15k from my bonus that my wife expected to pay off the loan and gambled it, so being able to pay it off myself was a big accomplishment.

      2 weeks ago I paid off 1 credit card, and Inna few hours my other one will be paid off. I’ve still got about 100k in loans, and I’m only paying about $5000 a month in them, but I’ve been making other progress too. I started contributing the max to my 401k, and I finally started depositing $700 per paycheck toward the savings account for my kids college that I plundered years ago.

      I’m not making the progress as quickly as I’d like, but as long as I keep paying my bills in time and applying the extra towards loans, I’m hoping to be out of this hole soon. Honestly, I don’t care much about the payments, it’s more my credit score. I was very late on 10 different accounts in March, and it’s trashed my credit. I’ve got over 30 accounts, and I’ve made every payment since then, I just don’t think I can get approved for anything right now. Down the road, I’d like to be able to buy a new car, buy a new house etc. My salary between my 3 jobs is currently almost $400k, so the income isn’t the problem, I just don’t know how much a credit score matters. I’m hoping a few more months of steady payments will help, I’m just disappointed at the progress.

      However, it’s been 5 months since my last big binge and 3 months since I made any bet. I went across the country last week for work and was invited to play poker at a coworkers house, which I really couldn’t turn down. Needless to say, I lost $40, was terribly bored and didn’t have the slightest itch. I was so glad when it was over.

      Anyways, that’s it for me. Talk to you all soon.

    • #51958
      hambone
      Participant

      It’s been awhile since updating this, but have been checking in regularly.

      I am still GF. I am pretty swamped working 3 fulltime jobs at the same time, but I am making great progress. I’ve been using 1 job to pay my wifes student loans (from 49k to 27k now) and paying for a few home improvement projects, as well as paying off *all* of our credit card debt.

      I am still working my “secret job” to payoff my loans, and although I am making headway, it’s a little frustrating how slow its been. My loans account for about $3000 a month, and my job gives me $5700 a month. I’ve been putting everything towards my loans, but previously I was taking $1400 more a month home, but I started putting $700 per pay into my kids college fund, as I had borrowed from it before.

      I am getting there, just wish it was a faster process.

      I’ve had some urges to gamble recently which was surprising. I always bought in using Bitcoin, and have recently been buying bitcoin again to buy myself edible thc gummys (helps with other issues) and I think having that access is a trigger, though I’ve kept it under control. I’ve been scheduling all my payments the day before I get paid, so when my paycheck hits, everything is accounted for.

      Thats it, keeping up the good fight, best of luck all.

    • #51959
      Badsportsbettor
      Participant

      Hey 

      like our I am in a large amount of debt. 60k and just in the process of stinging days together without gambling! It is a very very slow process sadly. Makes me reflect how easy it was to blow it but sooo hard to work it back.

      The thing that needs to be processed is the fact that this is our life now, just think how easy and good life will Ben without the gambling and a good amount of income coming in! You will be amazed!

    • #51960
      hambone
      Participant

      Well, so far, so good. I’m still GF, and recently hit a milestone. A few weeks ago I tried to buy some Bitcoin (how I gambled before) but this time it wasn’t for gambling. Anyways, the guy tried to steal my money and it took about 3 weeks to get it sorted out. Eventually, I got the Bitcoin back, which I wasn’t expecting. The problem was, I suddenly had $300 in Bitcoin and didn’t need it. I didn’t have a good way to get it into my bank, and it sat in my account. Usually, I would have deposited INSTANTLY. I thought about it, I admit. I even logged into an old account I still had left. It was even harder because this was before Thanksgiving, and this was the first Thanksgiving I didn’t bet football. In the end, I left the money in my wallet for about 3 days before getting it out. This might not sound like much, but it was a huge accomplishment.

      Still fighting the good right, still gf.

    • #51961
      hambone
      Participant

      213 days GF. Life is better than ever, financially and personally.

      I’m working 3 jobs at the same time paying down debts and getting my head out of water. It took alot to get myself in this mess and it takes even more to get out.

      Occasionally, I’ll do something I haven’t done since I quit gambling, and have a flashback. For example, we recently took the kids to an indoor play place; I suddenly remembered the last time we were there, I had a few huge bets live and was constantly checking my phone to see how it was going. It felt good knowing I didn’t have to live like that anymore and could just spend time with my kids.

      I have a long way to go, but am making it. to anyone out there struggling, just trust me you can do it. I had over $100k USD in debt and am chipping away, if I can survive these jobs for another year I’ll be debt free for the first time in my adult life.

    • #51962
      Newday54
      Participant

      It is great to hear your story to see how you are now 213 GF. i am in the middle of Day 3 now.  I went about five months GF from April to September 2019 and had a significant relapse in Septmeber that cost me a sizebale amount of our family’s savings over the last five months and required me to take on some debt.  A few days ago, I told myself “enough is enough” again for the millionth time.  I have put gambling blockers on my phone to try to rid this horrible sickness and keep me away from online casinos.  Hearing that you are 213 GF shows that it is indeed possible to start changing your life and I wish you continued success.  

    • #51963
      ARB90
      Participant

      Hi Hambone. It is great to see that you are over 30 weeks gamble free now. Congratulations, you are setting a great example for any newcomers on here and are living proof that recovery is achievable regardless of the circumstances of your past. I wish you all the best for the future.

    • #51964
      hambone
      Participant

      Thanks for the comments!

      I’m now 243 days GF.

      I’m still at the point where when I do things, like yesterday I went to a birthday party for a friends daughter, I still remember gambling on my phone while being at the party. It seems like a lifetime ago, but it struck me yesterday that soon I’ll remember the previous year and NOT gambling, which is significant for me.

      I’m writing today because I had a major event. I checked my credit score today and it jumped 39 points this month as I continue paying off loans.

      Last year this time was my absolute low, and in one year my score has jumped 152 points!

      I’m now looking at houses as I continue achieving my financial goals and dig myself out of this mess I created. Don’t get me wrong, I have a long ways to go. But, I’m almost to the point that if I decide I want to finance something, I can do that without worrying that my gambling has ruined that for me.

      It’s a long fight, but I can honestly say I haven’t had the urge to gambling in quite some time. For everyone out there at rock bottom, YOU CAN DO THIS.

      I gambled out of necessity. I didn’t know how to deal with financial pressure like an adult, and instead whenever something came up, my outlet was tying to win the money.

      We all have our reasons for this sick disease, I just want anyone reading this to know that by stopping today, your life truly begins. It won’t be easy, but the life you’re living is not your only option.

    • #51965
      Steev
      Participant

      Thanks for such a positive post and congrats on your 243 days.  It is interesting that now I have money (for the first time in decades) I am not going out and wildly spending it – but instead I feel comfortable in the fact that if something did come up, I could afford to sort it and not have to worry about it.  In fact not worrying has been the biggest thing for me.  I think when I was in action, I was just one big ball of worry!

      Good to hear that things are going well for you and that you are making plans for your gamble free future.  Your new life!

    • #51966
      hambone
      Participant

      Checking in….

      294 days GF. This month I got not 1 but TWO bonuses from my jobs. One is going to personal loans I took out while gambling, the other towards a personal goal.

      Things are progressing. I’ve just recently hit the 1 year anniversary at the second job I started to payoff my gambling debt. My debt has gone from 100k+ to about 40k, and I have my paychecks planned for the next 6 months – if everything goes as planned ALL the debt I’ve accrued over the last 15 years gambling will be paid by the end of December.

      Every day is a challenge, and each week I survive is a huge step forward. Gambling is the last thing I think about at this point, I just keep chugging forward.

      I wish everyone here who is struggling the best, and just know that if I can do this, anyone can. I’m approaching 1 year Gf for the first time in 17 years (and I’m 35, so half my life). I just found out a few days ago my wife is pregnant with our 4th child, and I have the joy of knowing this is my first child who’s life I NEVER gambled during.

      Best wishes everyone, stay safe and stay strong.

    • #51967
      hambone
      Participant

      UPDATE:

      I am still going strong – I’ve passed my unofficial 1 year GF (I had a slip up in July for 1 bet so I am counting that as my OFFICIAL 1 year,but my last real gambling was in May 2019)

      I continue to grow. I am getting in a better place financially, though I keep getting reminders how much damage I’ve caused. My credit score was ruined due to late payments on personal loans I took out to support my gambling. I’ve gone over a year without a late payment, and my credit is now “Excellent”, but I was declined for a car loan and a credit card recently, despite good income and score. It turns out these take years to fix, so fortunately I don’t need either right now.

      I’m still working multiple jobs and paying down my loans, I’ve paid off 9 or 10 loans in the last few months, and should be out of this debt by early 2021 based on my calculations.

      To anyone out there struggling, there is a way out. I have paid off over $100k in my personal loan debt in the last year.

      GAMBLING IS NOT THE ANSWER
      CUT YOUR LOSSES
      COME UP WITH A PLAN ON PAPER
      EXECUTE!

      Gambling is NOT the means to an end. It took my 10 years and hundreds of thousands to realize that. There are NO SHORTCUTS. The only way out of this is to STOP TODAY!

      Stay strong folks. This is beatable. If I can do it, ANYONE can.

    • #68422
      hambone
      Participant

      2 days ago I hit my 1 year GF milestone!!!
      n
      nMy life is so much better then it was when I wrote my first post. I still have hard days, and I am STILL working to pay off the financial damage I created during my gambling days, still running from ghosts of my past.
      n
      nThe difference is these days are much fewer, and I have a plan to get through them.
      n
      nAll I can say to anyone reading this is that if I can do this, ANYONE can. Stop the cycle. Stop betting. It is NOT the solution to your problems!

    • #68592
      Enough808
      Participant

      Inspiring journey! Thank you for sharing and glad you are doing well

    • #68813
      hambone
      Participant

      53 weeks ago I started this thread.
      n
      nI was 100k in debt, plus owed 17k on a car my wife thought was paid off.
      n
      n53 weeks later, I am gamble free. I have about 2 months before all that 100k is paid off, and last week I bought a new van for 38k and paid cash.
      n
      nRecovery is possible. Gambling is NOT the way out of your financial struggles.
      n
      nIf I can do it, so can you. Believe in yourself!

    • #69092
      hambone
      Participant

      Just an update for anyone reading this.
      n
      nMy 100k+ debt is now down to 13k. Additionally, I?ve paid off 42k in student loans, and 49k in loans for my wife.
      n
      nI am about 16 months GF and by the end of next month will officially be debt free. This burden I?ve carried for so long will finally be off of me. I?m not really sure how I?ll feel; I?ve spent so much time chasing, stressing and worrying. I?ve always worried about what?s going to come in the mail, who?s going to call. I haven?t gotten any bad calls or mail in months, but I still stress.
      n
      nI?m so excited to finally close this long, 18 year chapter of my life. Gambling had been such a big part of my life for so long, but after 16 months it?s completely gone. I?ll never go back to that person I was.
      n
      nAs always, if you?re reading this, trust me when I say you can beat this. If I can, anyone can. Come up with a plan that doesn?t require you to gamble. Gambling is NOT the means to an end.

    • #69097
      Meghna83
      Participant

      RESPECT (That is the first word that came to my mind)

      thank you so much for sharing this.

    • #69102
      G Rec
      Participant

      Well done on your progress so far in both staying gambling free and getting your debt nicely down.
      n
      nI always find reading success/progress stories like these are very helpful to reinforce what is possible if you stick to removing gambling from your life.

    • #73626
      hambone
      Participant

      Just in case anyone reads this…

      Today is Tuesday. Friday my last loan will be paid in full. That’s $150k USD in gambling debt paid off in 18 months. As I sit here and type this, it’s surreal. I’ve never felt less inclined to gamble than I do now. Instead, I am excited to keep grinding and saving; I’m going to build a house; pay off more debts, the future is endless.

      I love you all. I am not special. I succeeded because I had no other choice. I’m paying my last loan Friday and I’m having a baby Monday, it’s like I’m closing this chapter. This baby will never know gambling or debt.

      If I can do this, anyone can. If you’re reading this in a similar situation thinking I’m special, I’m not. I’m an addict. I worked my ass off and turned my life around. If I can, so can you.

    • #73627
      sunny
      Participant

      Hi Hambone, well done on what you had achieve so far! It has been very inspiring reading thru your journey.

      This show to us that we can be GF and continue to work towards recovery!

      Stay strong and look forward to more of your posting! ??

      Sunny

    • #75574
      hambone
      Participant

      Just checking in… still gamble free. Everyday my life is getting better, I am almost over my financial issues, and am working on building our dream house, something that was never possible when I gambled.

      Stay strong and put in the work guys, you can live GF, gambling is not the answer to your problems, it IS the problem

    • #77927
      hambone
      Participant

      It’s been awhile…..

      In March my wife found some mail that I had tried to hide. Once she confronted me, I let everything out. She was devastated as you’d expect, it after a few days we decided to try and get through it.

      I just hit 2 years GF. We had planned on building our house but cancelled when the perfect house for us hit the market: we’re now moved in and life is good.

      We still have our challenges, and I am still fighting battles everyday but the urge to gamble is gone. Id I can do this, anyone can. Good luck!!

    • #77966
      Badsportsbettor
      Participant

      That’s so awesome to hear! Good job and keep it up:)

    • #77968
      sunny
      Participant

      Well done hambone, u are such an inspiration!

      • This reply was modified 3 years, 5 months ago by sunny.
    • #78534
      hambone
      Participant

      I just wanted to follow up for anyone looking for hope. We’ve been in a 6000 square foot house for just about 3 months. I’m going on 3 years GF and I’ve never been happier emotionally, financially or personally.

      I was a junky, and I did it. You can to.

    • #142774
      hambone
      Participant

      Just checking in ——

      Still GF; I have the occasional thoughts about gambling, but when I realize how miserable I was back then, I quickly snap out of it.

      This time of year is always challenging, there’s a lot of financial pressure and stress – in the past I used to always breakdown around this time. This year is different – things are going well and I’m happy.

      If I can do this anyone can – gambling will never be the way out of your problems, please please believe me.

    • #159308
      hambone
      Participant

      Just checking in…

      I actually forgot about this site until I recently got a random email from a thread I apparently had subscribed to.

      Still GF. I don’t even consider it. Looking at how good my life is now versus then, I could never go back down that road.

      I wish everyone the best of luck. If I can beat this, anyone can.

    • #159312
      risingphoenix
      Participant

      Great to hear and thanks for the update Hambone!

    • #160426
      kathryn
      Participant

      Oh Hambone, I remember you!
      What a wonderful story, congratulations on your gamble free time! It still blows my mind when I think about this addiction, what it did to me, my family, my life. 13 years on and life is wonderful. Not perfect! But my God, I’m living! And so are you!
      Love K xxx

    • #162474
      hambone
      Participant

      Thanks Kathryn – and congrats!

      I came across tennis on ESPN tonight, and tennis was always my favorite to bet on; it got me thinking of this thread. I watched it for 5 minutes and couldn’t believe how boring it was, lol!

      I’m still GF – I’ve been working 3-4 jobs since 2019 (before it was cool!) and I’ve done very well for my family financially since I quit gambling.

      I hope everyone out there can find whatever they’re looking for in their addiction, and get it somewhere else!

      This sick disease will do nothing but hurt you, it’s a literal parasite. Gambling is NOT the means to an end, trust me. I lost several hundred THOUSANDS before I learned this.

    • #170432
      hambone
      Participant

      I just wanted to come back and post an update.

      I am still GF, I’ve lost track of time but I think its been almost 4 years!

      I dont have the urge to bet anymore; sportsbetting is legal here now, and I laugh at the commercials I’ve spent alot of time talking to my 8 year old son about gambling and what it can do to you, I’m hoping he wont follow my foot steps. Right now he hates gambling ??

      I take pride in having $0 balances on all my credit cards. My credit score is almost 800. I applied for a card last week to book a vacation with and get points and was approved with a high limit, it made me really proud.

      Recovery is possible. The life I’m living isnt perfect, but its a million times better than what I went through. YOU CAN DO THIS!

    • #179938
      hambone
      Participant

      Just following up –

      It’s been over 4 years GF. My life is nothing like it was when I wrote this post.

      We can heal, we can get better.

    • #179978
      risingphoenix
      Participant

      Glad to hear Hambone. That’s fantastic and paints a picture of hope for all of us here. Hope you and your family are doing great.

    • #184314
      hambone
      Participant

      I just wanted to check in and tell everyone I am still GF.

      I consider myself the worst of the worst, and if I can do it, you can.

      It’s not easy, but it’s worth it.

    • #189687
      dehzao
      Participant

      Hey! First of all congratulations on your stop.

      I have many similarities with your story. First of all, I am also working 2 jobs and getting a third one soon. The difference is that I have stopped and decided to come to this forum only 1 hour ago. The damages could be bigger, since on the last two weeks I’ve gamble during my work time and productivity dropped very much leaving me afraid of “something”.

      Anyway, your post touched me very much. I know how stressing it can be giving your full time and not resting, especially working from home, so you were very strong, and you know it. Will hang on to your story to cut my losses and my damages while they are not a gigantic problem.

      Best wishes.

    • #190029
      kin
      Participant

      Congratulation on staying gamble free successfully since the year 2019.

    • #190161
      hambone
      Participant

      Randomly decided to check in today and was shocked to see people commented on my post ??

      I’m still GF. My life is challenging like everyone else’s but it’s a hell of a lot easier with not gambling.

      I recently started getting into shape – I’ve gotten a little obsessed (missed one day since Jan 1) but it’s a good obsessed, I always overdo things.

      Everyone – stay strong during March madness! It will take a few years but right now I’m watching the games and enjoying them for the first time with no urge.

      I’m almost to the point where the negative reports on my credit fall off (7 years) life is good!

    • #204542
      sevillo449
      Participant

      Awaiting moderation

    • #204543
      sevillo449
      Participant

      Awaiting moderation

    • #204544
      sevillo449
      Participant

      Awaiting moderation

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