[LostitallAgain]

i just looked for meetings in Nottinghamshire near by and I could only find evening meetings. Unfortantly I can’t attend those because my boyfriend will demand to know where I’m going and I can’t let him know About my gambling issues. I have to keep this to myself.

I will try call gamblers anonymous and see what other options there are.

Thanks.

[LostitallAgain]

ove just read ur first original post here and one or two of the most recent ones.

Your story really helps me, so thank you for sharing.

I think getting mood under control is a big factor. I’m on antidepressants, anripsychotics and mood stabiliser attempting to do this. There’s no shame in needing a little extra to help out. If it works and helps then great!
Sorry u have been feeling a bit deflated I hope that passes soon.

Hugs. LostitallAgain.

[LostitallAgain]

i feel I will always be in the mood for gambling. I have emotionally unstable personality disorder aka borderline personality disorder. I’m terrible at control my mood. The slightest thing sends me straight downwards I also face highs and it can change in the space of minuets. It all steams from the abuse as a child. Problem with my diagnosis and myself is that addictive personality comes with it and risk taking.
I won’t use that as a excuse though. I know I’m strong enough to stop if I try hard enough. I just went on gambling site today think that cos I havnt won in ages I was due a win… As if there’s some kind of pattern to winning. I feel I’ve learnt how to play them but that’s clearly not true cos I’m in so much debt.

I don’t want this to be my life. So far all my life has been abuse, drink, drugs, self harm, gambling and failed suicide attempts. I’m terrified of this being my life till I die and I don’t want that. I’m running from a lot of emotional pain I know that and I know it results in me gambling. I know this and I know it’s a problem and I know that I can block myself out the sites but why can’t I just do it? Maybe I’m not ready to let go, I don’t know.

[LostitallAgain]

i got paid few days early. It suprised me and I went straight to the gambling site. I spent 400 pounds but last minute I won 365 so I withdrew that. So it’s only a loss of 35 pounds this time. Which is not great but not the end the world.

I think I need to adress why I gambled. And that was because I felt really low in mood at the time. Gambling gets me excited, I love the thrill that it gives me. Just like the thrill self harming gave me. I feel like I’m in a mess il never get out of. I couldn’t bare to buy a lock to put on it permantly but I have locked myself out the gambling site for 4 weeks.

[LostitallAgain]

thanks for everyone’s comments.

A little of topic but I have tried to kill myself recently. I do have proffessional help and I use it. So alls good there.

Anyway back to gambling …. Where can I get this block from?im not very good at these things. I think I deffinately need one I’m all ready dreaming of how much I can spend on gambling on Thursday.

Thanks again everyone.

[LostitallAgain]

both my parents are alcoholic and my dad was a gambler and got my family into finically issues. My mother tried to hide it from us as we were young but I saw him on online sites all the time gambling. He is self employed and should have been out working but instead staid home using loans to gamble and abuse me. Is wore is never ever be like him. I’ve been through a phase where I’ve abused alcohol myself a few years ago and have stopped now but now since then I’ve turned to gambling online too. If I could stop drinking that means I have the power in me to stop gambling too… I hope.

I play online gambling sites. I know I should block them but I still believe if I go on just one more time I will win the money I need to pay back the loans. I know I need to block myself from being able to use them but I’m not sure I am ready to??

I have only just admitted there is a problem, after months of my friend telling me how badly addicted I am and what a mess I’m getting myself into over it. Not just finically but psychologically. I sometimes get very suicidal when I loose more money because I don’t ever know how il pay back all that I owe and with other issues that get me down I think the easiest way out is to commit suicide. ( don’t worry I have no intention on doing this right now).

It’s so good to be able to talk here. I have been hiding all this from my boyfriend. He keeps asking where all my money’s gone and he had to lend me some to buy food.

I’m ashamed of myself big time.

[LostitallAgain]

i havnt been able to gamble for a few days because literally I have no money in the bank. But I get paid on Thursday and I have loans I need to pay back but I’m worried il end up using the money to gamble. Anyone got any tips how to cope?

[LostitallAgain]

Thanks for replying. Yes I have been in that situation where I have won a little and should have withdrawn the money but I carried on gambling and lost it all anyway.

Next time I want to gamble il come here and try answer other people’s posts instead..though that’s easier said then done.

Thanks again.

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