Thanks for checking in Velvet and always appreciate your concern and contributions to people and topics at GT. I’ve not had time to really look around but on the surface it appears that much has changed at the site. Pardon my loose analysis but things look very serious here, while professional and most likely appropriate, my initial impression is that much of the nonsense has been eliminated. I trust this is a good thing and accomplishes the missions/goals of GT, volunteers, staff, clients, families and visitors. Very Clean Look so kudos to the I.T. and marketing peeps.

Whew, what a year. Can’t tell you how thrilled I am to be past 2014! 2015 will surely be the 1st year that I can remember where I am never using 2014 by mistake in the opening months of the new year when writing, typing, etc..

So the quick story on me. Health has been a challenge for over 6 years but did survive lung cancer episode from 2008 and exceeded life expectancy. I guess I was supposed to die somewhere around July 2013 and, well, it is now January 2015 so there’s that. Had a heart attack in May while whoofing down 2 cheeseburgers and again, didn’t die. Haven’t smoked a cigarette since May 15, 2014 and hopefully saying goodbye to that 36 year old habit will prove to be beneficial. So I must say that I’m fine. I didn’t die and I’m Alive!!!!

As for addiction, you know the weak story that I could bore the world with, so I won’t . I am 2 days in to my battle and I intend to win, once and for all. My mindset was that I couldn’t ??almost die??, quit smoking ANDDDDD quit gambling all in the same year without major drama. Well, there was drama anyway so I actually could have quit. I have 2 goals starting today and this will go well. I’m very clear (now) on how easy it is to cold turkey and along with some moral support then I predict that I will be fixed soon. Not broken but pretty high level of disgust for the moment.

One of my favorite quotes from an old-timer on GT was so simple and so relevant; ??Change this for you 1st, not for others??

And so it will be.
Frozen

There are many worthless, meaningless, ridiculous, dangerous activities that I did NOT engage in over the past week. 1 of those was gambling. A very small and significant step towards the ultimate goal.

Very good feeling to see the immediate benefits of walking away from the addiction(s). Keep walking on the smart path and enjoy the ??extras?? that have more meaning than the worthless crap they gave you at the Loser’s Palace! 14 days behind me and looking forward to running soon.

Frozen

3 weeks behind me and something about ??recovery begins after 21 days of abstinence??

No desire to go backwards. Looking straight ahead to tomorrow. F

This morning marks the 30th day that I haven’t placed a bet or been involved with gambling. This is my most sincere, determined and successful crusade against the stupidity. I hope the marking of time and constant obsession with ??days clean?? will be a thing of the past, very soon. I love the freedom and seek joy. Peace, F

I’m amazed at the power of mind over matter through all of this. I suppose the clichés that have been thrown my way over the years were actually very valuable had I just listened. I’m not sure why I rejected so much wisdom from such simple statements but I find that the one-liners are true. ??You can do anything if you just put your mind to it?? doesn’t mean much to a struggler, an addict, a slacker, a gambler. Yesterday on my way to the airport I got involved in an arrest of a drug addict on a street corner. The 2 police officers couldn’t get handcuffs on the irate, barefooted, bloodied man and so I jumped out of my car to assist. Once the backup officers arrived on the scene I simply walked back to my car in the congested intersection and drove away. Because he was wielding a weapon and saying crazy rubbish to the police, I suspect he’s lucky he didn’t get shot or at the very least a tazer applied to his leg during his uncontrollable ranting. He’s fortunate to be in jail today where he still has a heartbeat, a warm meal and a chance to recover from what appeared to be an inexcusable amount of drugs in his system. Perhaps he was given a chance to survive and move past his addiction because he was taken away from the street corner where another round of drugs could have been purchased and consumed. Perhaps he is alone now without the temptation of feeding his habit and removed from people that don’t care if he lives or dies. Maybe this will be his last episode and he will so despise the possibility of yet another arrest that he will choose to ??put his mind to it?? and just stop. It will have to be his idea and his mind and his actions to overcome whatever he’s facing. It will have to be his idea and his decision to stop the illusion that drugs make him feel better or provide some escape that is better than reality. Hopefully this stranger that I helped ??cuff?? and contain will finally put his mind to it. Such a simple statement, such an easy thing, once we put our (OWN) mind to it. Compulsive Gambling is no different from any other addiction and I’m happy to say that for the past 7 weeks, ??I put my mind to it?? and remain free of gambling. F