[Thenewjt]

Reading the threads and journals here surely made me feel a little enlightened, so.. let me pls share my story and maybe ask for some help from you guys.

Im 28yrs old, yeah i destroyed my life this early.. im not sure if ill be in the books for listing as the youngest broke CG here, and to consider I’ve been gambling for 4 yrs now.
Before gambling, i had a good job and was quickly promoted which granted me a higher wage. It felt all good that time, success and work gave me all the HIGHs. I was happy TOTALLY. But with that i wanted more money, quick cash.

And so gambling happened, i quit my job after i had borrowed money from friends to cover up the cash i stole from the company before audit. Then that was my first break from the addiction, till i relapsed after 1 year. Now i got even worse, ive lost double of the debts i had before, lied to friends to borrow money. To make things more complicated- ive been planning to marry my gf on our 10th yr anniv this 2017, but all of it…. GONE.

If theres anyone out there whos quite the same story or would want to share anything that would help me cope, id be glad to hear you.
P.s. i know i can do this. Ive heard and told myself that so many times, but i always fail.

[kingster]

HI Thenewjt, welcome to the forum, well done for making the step coming here. I used to think after each realapse i couldnt do it and stop, tell everyone the same story il stop ill do this ill do that, then each time it got worse and worse and worse, until i hit rock bottom, i sold my flat behind my wifes back and I lost it all wracked up debt up to my eyeballs , lost my job lost my family I had a 1 year old, there was no future for me, I new it was time to stop so my only option was to go to gordon moody rehav centre, i told people and myself so many lies i need to completely break the habit. It was alife saver for me, I managed to get my wife and little girl back and now im working again and gamble free for nearly 3 years and the happiest and healithest I have been, it is possible, the best advice i can give is to be open and honest about everything, any secret white lie will come back and bite your bum and you will end up back gambling, start to busget and transfer finaces over maybe to your future wife, use these rooms forums and consider Gordon Moody I wish I had 10 years ago but kept saying i can do it on my own. there are som many of us like that out there, but you can do it. Im here for you and if you want to ask anything feel free

[Dunc]

Hello and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums

Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. ?We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. ?We’re in this together!

Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. ?The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. ?So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick to keeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to be updated on your progress or share something with you.

As well as the forums New Members are invited to join Charles in the New Members Practical Advice Group On Mondays at 21:00 (UK) and Thursday at 19:00(UK)

And on that note….

I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you ??

Take care

The Gambling Therapy Team

PS: Let me just remind you to take a look at our privacy policy and ?terms and conditions so you know how it all works! ???

[Thenewjt]

Thankyou kingster,
But like the other i kept coming back to pay up my debts whenever i had a paycheck. How did u deal with yours?

[Thenewjt]

Tried playing and setting time limits before but failed., Tried testing myself for control once again but failed.
Learning- dont fool yourself. Once you get in a casino, youre done.

[kingster]

Originally i gave control to my wife and she still has control, but times before coz i had no control i wanted secret money, but now i have an account and its monitored by my wife I get to feel a sens little sense of control, hows things goig today?

[Thenewjt]

Appreciate the replies kingster,
I expect to be gambling free till sat since im spending holidays with my family and got no urge at all since im totally broke.. test resume by sunday again. Hopefully ill be successful.

Were u in debt before like how much of your annual income? Sorry to ask but whenever i realize how deep in debt i am, thats the time my urge gets too strong. Have you dealt with those things too?

[Névtelen]

Hello JT.

You are being honest when you say no urges-because you’re totally broke. But why do you only expect to be gambling free til Saturday?

If you know you have money coming, and you know you will get the urge, why not stand tall and make a stand now. If you cant ask your girlfriend to look after your money please confide in someone you trust and ask them to keep your bank card over the weekend.

Debt mate for a lot of us will be an ever present for the remainder of our lives.

You are in debt because of gambling, you will not get out of debt doing the same thing as you did before. Try and turn the situation to your advantage, have you spoken to Stepchange they can help immensely with debt problems.

When I say turn it to your advantage I mean instead of seeing this mountain of debt as a reason to gamble. See it as the result of gambling, not just one very bad gambling episode but the result of hundreds of attempts to get debt debt free. Gambling does not cure debt, it creates it. And as you know debt is only part of the problem. In fact its not part of the problem its just one of the many consequences of gambling.,

Instead of letting yourself get concerned about a consequence of past actions, try and concentrate on taking preventative steps to avoid adding to it.

I earn between ￡11 and ￡15 per hour, my debt is over 200k.

The debt dosn’t consume me, it cant allow it to. I can live and enjoy life now. You can too mate.

Take care.

Geordie.

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