Living with the nightmare.

timetostop — Wed, 27 Apr 2022 11:58:42 +0000

I am 34 and have been gambling a long time. Around 4years ago the bets started to increase(and the wins) and all was good, then came the losses and chasing that one big win to be done with it. I then moved and had a lot more money freed up but I thought new start no need to gamble.
It wasn’t long until I started again but this time I could bet bigger and obviously that would come with bigger wins and less worries. It started well I had gambled around ￡5000 but it was okay because my balance was over ￡20000 and my wife would never know so I withdrew the balance happy that I had beaten the casino and was up. Before the withdrawal had been processed I had signed up to another betting site telling myself I can spend a could of grand as I’m up and can win even more. That’s when it got really bad before I knew it I had spent another ￡20000 and was checking daily for the withdrawal to be in my account so my wife wouldn’t know I told myself that was the end and I didn’t have a problem.
Fast forward a month the money was in my account I was down but not too bad I thought I will have one more go cap myself at a ￡1000 and try make up the loss this never happened and by the end of the following week I had spent ALL the family savings roughly ￡50000 and then started working through my credit cards applying for more and more online all day racking up debt.
It’s wasn’t long until my wife noticed I had stopped sleeping stoped wanting to go out and fell into a real depression. When she confronted me I tried to lie my way through down playing the issue not only to here but too myself I did however stop , for a while. Then it started any bit of money o could get together that she wouldn’t know about to gamble away.
Fast forward 6months till she discovered again and again I lied and said it wasn’t that bad I don’t have a problem but this time I really tried to stop and cut and run from gambling the issue was the debt I had racked up ￡30000 in debt a constant reminder of what I had done. For months I stayed away from gambling telling myself I didn’t have a problem I’m not that weak until again the opportunity presented itself to gamble(and get away with it) if I win all my problems go away, I don’t I lost this again lead to my wife finding out and what I thought was the final straw for her.
I now know I have a gambling problem and really don’t want to lose my wife of 12years and my son, I have a mountain of debt to try work through and a constant reminder of my failings. I gambled to fill a gap then the depression of the losses and magnitude of debt kept drawing me back at the moment I don’t see how I can break the cycle with the constant reminder looming over.

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From Impactful Winnings to Crazy Debts

ajgamba — Mon, 13 Dec 2021 15:08:14 +0000

boy oh boy.. 2020 started off crazy for me. well for all of us.
a little about me before i get into the nitty gritty.
I’m a 24 year old from Ukraine, with a gambling addiction. I’m not from any rich background, and i freelance as a developer.
I always thought in moments of regret, why I gamble, and why I’m pushing myself into a hole of dept at such an age, and I always seem to have the same answer, loneliness and boredom. not to mention online influencers.
i started off gambling in the start of 2020 on an online casino, gambling around the 2-3$ mark. it was just tasteful fun and experience, that didn’t really have any impact on me financially. One day i hit a jackpot with 2$ and cashed out 1000$. it took mere seconds for the to happen.. i believe that’s were i got hooked. yeah, i still work the same job as i did in 2020 but I make a bit more. but just for context, I don’t gamble with 2-3$ anymore, the minimum bet i toss into online slots or roulettes is around the 100-400$ per bet. so sometimes i end up spending 1-3k$ per day. every month i have a dept to close. but every now and then i hit small jackpots giving me hope that someday I’ll hit a big one which might secure something in my future.
this.. mental strain and depression is really getting to me. I’m writing this after losing 5k$ today taken from my savings account. Trying to make back last month’s lost money. instead burying myself in deeper dept. the scariest thing about all this, is how well aware i am of the grave mistakes I’m doing and how i keep doing them despite this fact.

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Living with the nightmare.

From Impactful Winnings to Crazy Debts