Hi vintagehoby.

It is very brave of you coming here and tell your story. Now, relapses happen and it is ok as long as you don’t put yourself pressure. I have had gambling problem for a decade now and I have had many of these bad days. However the best days are those where you take the decision of moving out again. Remember who you are and that it is only one day lost of your life. It does not determine the progress you have nor your future. Remember that deep down you know your limitation and that you are human after all. A human that is here to fight and give a better future to yourself and the people around you. Be proud of you mate. Xoxo

Hi Vintagehoby. Yes, you are very brave to be open about your relapse. Its part of our journey to relapse and get back on the horse again. You certainly are not on your own. I’m struggling to stop for 24 hours at the moment. Super well done for the length of time you managed to stop for. Have you managed to stop again now? I have been reading some interesting research about just how this addiction is chemical and that our brains become wired for gambling in a chemical reaction sense. That must be why it is so hard to stop. We have to start rewiring ourselves to stop producing the chemicals we produce when we gamble. I think thats the gist of the research? Maybe someone can shed some light on this. Anyway, keep going again. You are not alone.

I am at the beginning of the stopping journey vintagehoby. I cant event stop for one day at the moment. When I do try I find distractions work like watching a good film, going for a walk, anything really to try and take my mind off getting obsessive thoughts about gambling and acting on them. Also I have been trying wellness meditation apps – they seem to be quite good. It’s good that you stopped yourself getting more money from the ATM. The only thing I have done is cut down the amount I’m gambling. But that isn’t foolproof and I know that really the only way is to cut it out completely.

Yes, I think I get what you are saying? It’s as though money has lost its real meaning – winning or losing its kind of the same? Is that what you mean? I think filling that void has long gone. I feel as though I am on auto pilot about gambling. I just have to do it. Win or lose. I dont care anymore. That’s why its so important to stop. life is going on around. We need to jump back in to reality. Otherwise its like being in some strange Scifi movie – reality has changed. Yes, I do work too and have a job. That keeps me sane I think!

Let’s try and keep those things at the front of our minds: family, friends, jobs, things we enjoy doing. The REAL aspects of life: not the fantasies of winning loads of money. We know that this will never happen! If winning or losing have lost their ‘fix’ worth – then why are we carrying on? I can win ￡X of money – but I have definitely lost ￡X money same amount. All I am really doing is winning back the money I have spent. Why not just not bother to gamble it in the first place? I will have the same amount of money anyway? Just to get my ‘fix’ of gambling highs which dont even get me high anymore? It’s rubbish. It’s a waste of my life. It’s time to stop. Surely? And yet…why can I put ￡10 on a game and win ￡1200 which I did and so have you and everyone else and THAT’S why the gambling companies keep reeling us into their NETS!!!